the Farewell Begins

I sit here now on this comfortable front porch of the Forbes' household. The grand vistas down to the ocean are like soothing rhythms in my mind. For soon I know the view will change from the long horizontal lines to a weaving of vertical lines as I return home and where I look up at the Niagara Escarpment and down into 40 Mile Creek. It will be springtime and the leaves will have just begun to colour the stark branches of the maples, acacias and catalpas in my yard. The hemlocks and spruces will soon have other greens, yellows and reds to fill out this weaving of new life all around my eyes.

I am into the ritual saying of "this is the last....". It leaves me uneasy, confused and with an increasing sense of dislocation. How could I have begun to feel so at home in such a short time? How has this time with the people of the Bethel Circuit opened me into so many new perspectives and experiences? How will I be able to leave with grace?

I take some encouragement from my own feelings at last night's farewell worship service. Normally I'm a person who avoids accolades and such; yet there was something about the wonder of the people who stood up to share a story, a meaning in their life that somehow I was a part of. I sat and listened and laughed and cried. And through it all, I saw the hand of God. This was not about me. The celebration was a affirmation of the discovery of the presence of God among the people in many new ways. I heard courage and clarity; I saw confidence and compassion; I felt anticipation and wisdom. It was appropriate that I was leaving for it seems my laughter and challenges to dance with God in new ways in the world had been carried by the Spirit into the midst of the people of the Bethel Circuit. They had already begun to hold onto the Spirit differently. I needed to remove myself and not get into the way of their new dance.

I said goodbye in South District Methodist Church, the small, wonderfully warm congregation in a little village where I had my first worship service 13 weeks earlier. The women of the congregation gathered at the front and sang a hymn that I had taught them earlier that morning - We Shall Go Out With Hope of Resurrection. The tears well up just remembering that moment. Then they followed that hymn with a praise song where they pulled out their cymbals (tambourines) and before one knew it, everyone was up and clapping and singing and dancing. What joy!

Somehow saying goodbye in the Spirit is easier. It was also made easier for Rev. Paul Walfall blessed the communion chalice and platter that I had purchased in Barbados. He spoke beautifully about how I will use them in Canada and in doing so will bind the people of the Bethel Circuit in a unique way to the worshiping community in Canada. Such will be a unique expression of the Body of Christ.

The service was a deeply meaningful moment - one that affirmed again that we are merely instruments of the Holy One who moves us in and out of people to bind them into hope, to re-member them into the one people of God who can stand and face the forces of the world that seems determined to destroy the beauty that is life. With all these experiences and feelings and reflections and relationships embodied, it is time to begin the movement to the next place God has in mind for me. Ordination with The United Church of Canada as a Minister of Word, Sacrament and Pastoral Care will follow soon. Sophia has journeyed well with me here in Barbados!